sacred bird

see ya, reader(s)

180 — Fri, 30 Jul 2010 02:19:22 +0000

i’m sad to write that after a couple years and close to 1,200 posts today is the last day of delivering the news you can use here at sacred bird. while i’ve loved posting here about news you can use, 630 and i think it’s time to pack it in. from our first post, to the beijing olympics, to our coverage of politics and fashion, we’ve tried to give a lighter side of the news and to keep you informed and sounding brilliant at work or at your next “whatever.” i wish i could say that i’ve parlayed my love of news into a gig at the daily show, or even better, a stint alongside anderson cooper but that hasn’t happened yet–i’ll be back though, just you wait and see. so in parting, i’ll leave you with one of the ultimate goodbyes–the one where k-k-k-katie says ’see ya’ to her one true love hubbell. the memories of sacred bird will, um, continue to light the corners of my mind. thank you, dear reader (not plural) for keeping an eye on the news you can use.

sincerely,

180

[image courtesy of wordle]

like madoff but with a passion for the can

630 — Wed, 28 Jul 2010 22:31:16 +0000

travis wright, a money manager in utah, apparently believes in the idea of food in a can so much that he took his clients’ money that, which was suppose to have gone towards real estate investments, and put it toward his food in a can concept – peanut butter and jelly “candwich, bbq chicken”, pizza pocket and french toast. too bad his clients didn’t believe his idea enough to believe they would get the 24% return on investment he had promised on the real estate investments when they gave him the money. wright is currently being sued by the securities and exchange commission. mark kirkland, the president of mark one foods and the patent holder of the food in the can concept, still believes his idea will work. he already has a slogan “Quick & Tasty, Ready to Eat”, now he’ll just need to find another investor. frankly, i’m surprised canned sandwiches don’t already exist in the market already.

[nytimes]

you’ve got to be *&^% kidding me

180 — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 01:05:47 +0000

here’s one from jolly old england that most likely would have celebrity chef gordon ramsay of kitchen nightmares cursing up a storm and saying ‘you’ve got to be *&^% kidding me.’ a pub chain in england is adding menu items to their repertoire–for dogs. butcher’s pet care is teaming up with brakspear to offer delectable items that are designed to increase family bonding with their dogs. according to butcher’s pet care’s brand manager caroline coombs “We’ve built our business on feeding generations of family dogs and all our recipes are naturally nutritious and contain all of the vitamins and minerals your dog needs to keep him healthy, happy and fit as a Butcher’s dog…Now dog owners can sit down to lunch happy in the knowledge their dog is enjoying their meal as much as they are is adding a menu for dogs.” when the family sits down eat, fido can enjoy a bowl of liver and garden veg chunks in gravy and chicken and beef chunks in jelly.

cue the jokes about bad british food…..now.

[telegraph, photo via bbc]

now where’s that dingo?

180 — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 00:38:51 +0000

of course i’m referring to that movie with meryl streep where she proclaimed “the dingo ate my baby” in the movie a cry in the dark about missing baby azaria chamberlain. american tourist jean barnard would have been happy to have had a dingo to whisk away the toddler that she claimed screamed so loud in her ear that the three year old loud speaker made her ears bleed and caused permanent damage. according to the story in time magazine, barnard sued qantas for negligence and failing to protect passengers. of the incident, settled out of court, qantas said “Plaintiff’s injuries, if any, were caused by the arbitrary and volitional act of a three-year-old child. Flight attendants cannot predict when children aboard an aircraft are about to scream. There is no evidence that the child was screaming in the terminal, or on board the aircraft prior to the particular scream which allegedly caused the damage.”

barnard has no love for this kid, she said “The pain was so excruciating that I didn’t even know I was deaf” and in emails she is said to have written “I guess we are simply fortunate that my eardrum was exploding and I was swallowing blood…Had it not been for that, I would have dragged that kid out of his mother’s arms and stomped him to death.”

i’m sure she meant that in the nicest of ways.

[time, photo via djabonillojr.2008, azaria chamberlain story]

princess leia on a nyc subway

630 — Fri, 23 Jul 2010 15:33:27 +0000

this is what it would’ve looked like if star wars had taken place in 2010, nyc

greene for president in 2012?

630 — Fri, 23 Jul 2010 15:02:10 +0000

there was a lot of speculation about fraud and other such nonsense when alvin greene won the democratic nomination for us senate in south carolina beating out a former judge who had been considered a shoo-in. no one knew anything about greene except that we was an unemployed veteran. greene has been a little more visible these past couple of weeks with his first public speech the other day and today we find out more about why he left the military. in a military performance report , a reviewer wrote that green was “”usually capable of handling mundane tasks with supervision” but is “not able to adapt to any changes to daily routine”. greene “required a daily to-do list” to perform his regular duties and had a “consistent inability to follow instructions or maintain basic job knowledge”. greene of course is refuting what was written saying problems with his computer “can often make it impossible for me to accomplish tasks in a timely fashion” and that it was a “hostile work environment”. i don’t know what he’s complaining about. sounds like his personality is perfect for the senate.

[ap]

limiting the advancement of one colored person

180 — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 01:22:52 +0000

the national association for the advancement of colored people (n.a.a.c.p.), the champion of civil rights can now take responsibility for the limiting of one colored person named shirley sherrod. ms. sherrod, up until yesterday, worked for the department of agriculture. she was forced to resign because a video of her giving a speech about the perils of racism was edited to look like she was a racist. in reality in the speech she gave last winter to the n.a.a.c.p. ms. sherrod explained that her work more than two decades ago with a white farmer taught her overcome her discriminatory beliefs and made her realize that there was no place in the world for racism in editing, it was made to look like she was denying service to or was providing a lower level of service based on the fact that the white farmer was white.

the n.a.a.c.p., wanting to look good, called her out and said something about a yardstick and civil rights. fox news, wanting to look like, fox news, wanted to make her, the government, and the n.a.a.c.p. look bad. and the federal government, wanting to look decisive, pressured her to resign and so she did.*

fast forward less than 24 hours and the real tape revealed that she was making an anti-racism speech. secretary of agriculture vilsack has called her back and offered her her new job. i’m guessing she’s going to look for employment elsewhere.**

* it’s got to be said that the feds acted faster on firing this poor lady than they did fix the oil spill.

** one that offers mutual respect and common civility.

[nytimes, naacp pledge]

song name not to be changed

630 — Tue, 20 Jul 2010 16:43:04 +0000

the young men’s christian association, also known as the ymca, is going through a little rebranding. they’ve decided to drop the “mca” and just go with the Y, as they’ve been commonly called for years. said kate coleman, the chief marketing officer said “It’s a way of being warmer, more genuine, more welcoming, when you call yourself what everyone else calls you.”

it’ll be a sad thing 10 years down the line when the kids singing and dancing to the village people’s “ymca.” song don’t know where the song came from. but then again, I’m not sure it really matters the members of the group in their outfits – the cop, the cowboy, etc

[foxnews.com]

jessica simpson’s show won’t be sponsored by vaseline

180 — Tue, 20 Jul 2010 01:33:58 +0000

not sure if anyone watched it, but jessica simpson had a show on vh1 called the price of beauty, a show designed to “explore how different cultures define beauty and the extraordinary lengths that women will go to in order to achieve it”. the show is being retooled, and is rumored to be yet another makeover show. i’m pretty sure though, that this product won’t be on the market–a skin whitening product called ’skin white’ from vaseline.

the product got a little bit lot of bad publicity last week when facebook india debuted an app, also sponsored by vaseline designed to whiten skin. it features the effect of the product on indian actor and bollywood star shahid kapur’s face–he gets a few shades lighter. men are invited to try out the product using the application. not surprisingly, people were kind of appalled by the application and many protests came up. in response, vaseline said

Vaseline is committed to creating culturally relevant products that meet the needs of its consumers in markets around the world.Much like self-tanning products in North America and Europe, skin lightening products are culturally relevant in India. In India, men use these products to lighten and even out their natural skin tone and to reduce the appearance of spots while protecting their skin from the sun. The Facebook application was created for the Indian market as a culturally relevant and engaging way for Indian men to interact with this product.

i guess they were trying to show how relevant the product is in this print ad.

[vaseline app for facebook, price of beauty, print ad via copyranter]

now you’re asking them to tell?

180 — Fri, 16 Jul 2010 05:14:29 +0000

in an unprecendented move, the military is asking the forces what they think about gays in the military. they’re doing it by electronic survey distributed last week distributed to 400K active duty personnel. it’s unprecedented because they didn’t do this when, say, they were integrating the military or when they were including women and many think it is a way to slow the process of repealing ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’.

senator levin, democrat from michigan and chairman of the senate armed forces committee says that while the survey is unusual, he supports it. the chairman believes that the policy should be repealed but says “I think it’s okay, even though it’s kind of unprecedented…I can understand the resentment, by the way, in the gay community, that this occurs now but not with those other efforts”. the efforts he was referring to were the aformentioned inclusion of blacks and women in the military ranks.

the survey data will be included in a final report on about ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’ due to be delived to the president on december 1, 2010.

[washington post, photo of relesased lt. dan choi via bilerico]